


The Party

by heismyfirstolive (orphan_account)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Drunken Confessions, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-26
Updated: 2015-02-26
Packaged: 2018-03-15 08:28:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3440393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/heismyfirstolive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'So, maybe Cas was a little bit in love with his best friend. Totally not a big deal.'</p><p>Or, the one where Cas confesses his love to Dean and doesn't regret it one bit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Party

Cas sighed in resignation, watching as his roommate-turned-best friend walked out of their apartment.

“You coming, Cas?” Dean turned to ask, even though he already knew what Cas’ answer would be.

“Yes, Dean. I _will_ come to this awful party with you, despite the fact that I have a paper due tomorrow and _despite_ the fact that you know I detest social gatherings.” Cas grabbed his coat and followed his friend out of the front door, locking it behind him.

“Hey, you can’t say that it’s awful when you're not even there yet,” Dean protested. They started towards the staircase that would take them onto the street.

“ _Every party is awful_ , Dean. Almost three years of college and so far every single one you've dragged me to has been objectively terrible.” They pushed through the building’s main door and headed in the direction of the student house that was hosting the party. “In fact I resigned to stop attending them a long time ago.”  Dean smirked, cocky, “And yet here you are, on your way to yet another party. They can’t be that bad if you keep agreeing to go to them with me.”

“The only reason I keep going since vowing to never set foot in another one again is because you, Dean Winchester, are an emotionally manipulative bastard.”  That shocked a laugh out of Dean, who threw his head back and laughed so hard and so beautifully that it made Cas’ chest constrict like there suddenly wasn't enough air.

So, maybe Cas was a _little_ bit in love with his best friend. Totally not a big deal.

The two friends carried on like that, alternating throwing insults at each other with talking about their plans for the fast approaching summer vacation. It was a nice night, the air crisp and clear with the promise of many warm days to come, and Cas was glad to be outside even with the worry of his unfinished paper in the back of his mind.

Before long they reached the house. It belonged to some friends of Dean’s that he had met through the sci-fi and fantasy club - Charlie, Victor and Benny - who were lovely people as far as Cas could tell, although he didn't know them all that well. The party that night was in honour of Charlie’s birthday, so the crowd there would mostly be from the aforementioned club as well as the LGBTQ society, of which Charlie was treasurer. 

There were definitely worse kinds of people to spend an evening in the company of (Cas shuddered as he recalled a frat party he had been dragged to in freshman year - not an experience he wished to repeat), but Cas was still not looking forward to the awkward small talk, terrible dancing and questionable music that he would have to endure for the next few hours. Secretly he hoped Dean would get tired fairly soon and want to leave early.

Dean turned to him before they entered, his eyes softening as he picked up on Cas’ nervousness. “You okay, man?”

Cas appreciated his friend’s concern, but he had come too far to bow out now. “I’m fine. Let’s just get this over with.”

Dean chuckled at Cas’ response and reached out to ring the doorbell. Cas could hear loud music thumping from behind the door and part of him doubted anyone would actually hear the bell, so he was pleasantly surprised when the door opened to reveal a shortish red-haired woman wearing skinny jeans and a pretty blouse.

“Dean!” Charlie squealed and launched herself at Dean, standing on tiptoes to embrace him hard. Cas would be jealous if he didn't already know Charlie was gay.

“Hey Charlie,” Dean said, returning the hug just as affectionately. As Charlie pulled away he asked, “How’s the party?”

“Boring until you got here, nerd. Hey Cas,” Charlie said, surprising Cas with a less vigorous but still friendly hug. “I think pretty much everyone’s here now. Come inside, I’ll get you guys a drink.”

They followed Charlie as she led them through the house, Dean greeting many of the people they passed and Cas nodding politely whenever he recognised someone.

Once furnished with drinks (beer for Dean, vodka lemonade for Cas), they spent the next hour or so idly chatting with Victor and Benny in the kitchen. Charlie was flitting around the house, which was pretty packed, making sure everyone was having a good time and policing the music being played loudly in the living room.

Cas was shocked to discover that he was actually having a good time, and when he said as much to Dean his friend smiled brightly and nudged him with an elbow. “See? I knew there was a party animal somewhere inside you. All it takes is a few drinks and some awesome company.”  Cas wasn't sure why that made him blush, but it did, so he tried to hide it by offering to fix more drinks for everyone. Dean was probably right in suggesting it was the alcohol that had loosened him up and made him more sociable, although Cas suspected a large part of it had to do with being around Dean and watching his friend having fun.

Apparently Cas was enjoying himself so much that when Victor suggested the group move into the living room to dance, he didn't even think to refuse. Then Dean grabbed his wrist to pull him along as they made their way down the hall and Cas thought his heart might just climb out of his throat.

The living room was fairly large and Cas estimated there were thirty or so people in there, dancing enthusiastically (and drunkenly) to some song Cas had never heard before. The room was dark, presumably to make it more atmospheric, but someone had brought some disco lights that flashed brightly and bathed the room in different colours.

Cas hardly had time to even think about feeling uncomfortable before Charlie ran squealing into the room, dragged Cas and Victor to the centre of the crowd and started dancing between them. Really, Cas had no choice but to join in, and he had to admit that it was entertaining. The fact of Charlie being gay and Cas being totally hung up on someone else took the pressure off gyrating to the music with her, and Cas found himself laughing harder than he had in a while.

It felt like he’d been dancing for a long time when Cas decided to take a breather and excused himself from the throng of people to get a drink from the kitchen. Charlie was long gone, somewhere else in the house, and Cas had been dancing with strangers instead, which was surprisingly not awkward. Cas hadn't caught sight of Dean for a while, he’d been too busy to pay much attention to what his friend was doing, but he was confident that Dean wouldn't leave the party without him. Cas expected to find him skulking somewhere near the fridge looking for more beer.

What he didn't expect, however, was to take a wrong turn on the way to the kitchen and find Dean pressed up against a girl, kissing her fervently.

Cas stopped abruptly and couldn't help but let out a shocked gasp, which Dean unfortunately heard, his head snapping upwards at the sound.

“Hey, buddy,” he drawled. And it was that, the utterly carefree way that Dean called him ‘buddy’ as though Cas’ heart wasn't breaking on the spot, as though his breaths weren’t coming shorter and faster and _oh my god I think I’m having a panic attack_.

Cas whimpered, which was embarrassing, before turning tail and practically running out of the house, pushing past the writhing blur of bodies clogging the hallway. He burst out through the door onto the front lawn and bent down, hands on his knees, to draw in several shuddering breaths.

Cas’ head whirled with the image of Dean, his tongue shoved down someone else’s throat, his hands tangled in _her_ hair, not Cas’, and why did he ever in his wildest dreams think Dean might want him like that? A sob forced its way past his lips as Cas thought of how naive he’d been.

His breathing somewhat back to normal, Cas furiously scrubbed away the tears that had come unbidden and stood up straight, dead set on leaving the godforsaken party and preferably not running into Dean for the foreseeable future.

“Cas!”

Of course, Cas’ luck had clearly run out a long time ago.

Cas turned to face Dean, his best friend in the entire world, the man he had fallen for hopelessly and completely, and somehow it hurt even more to see him look so unaffected while Cas’ whole world was falling to pieces.

“What the fuck, man? You bailin’ on me? And what the hell was that back there?” To make matters worse it seemed Cas had managed to piss off Dean.

“It’s nothing, I’m just tired. I’m going home. I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening with whatever-her-name-is.” The snide comment was out before Cas could consider whether or not it was a bad idea.

Dean frowned. “Her _name_ is _Lisa_ , and if you have a problem with her, why don’t you just come out and say it?”

“I don’t have a problem with her, Dean, you can hook up with as _many_ strangers as you want, whatever makes you happy!” To Cas’ dismay, their raised voices had drawn a small crowd of people from inside the house onto the front lawn. As if this train wreck _needed_ an audience.

“Oh you are _so_ out of line, man,” Dean hissed, lowering his voice and stepping closer to Cas. “What the hell does it matter to you who I get off with, huh? Why do _you_ care? Let me live my own goddamn life.”

Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was being in such close proximity to Dean, but Cas was really starting to lose it. “I don’t give a shit who you decide to _fuck_ , Dean! Trust me, I don’t care at all. I’d just rather you didn't shove it in my face, to be honest.” Cas felt angry tears starting to fall which sort of betrayed him on the whole not-caring thing.

Cas thought he saw a crack in Dean’s angry façade, thought he saw a glimmer of some other emotion - hurt, guilt, he wasn't sure - but that was quickly replaced by a look of confusion. “‘Shove it in your face’? Christ, we weren't even in the same _room_ as you.” Dean sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Jesus, this is… This is ridiculous. Why are you even so mad about this, huh? What right do you have to be angry at me?”

Cas huffed a sigh and blurted out in a shaky voice the one thing he’d been hoping to never admit. “Well I’m sorry for being so upset about seeing the man I love kissing some random girl.”

Maybe Cas imagined it, but he was pretty sure he heard a collective sharp intake of breath from their small audience. What he definitely did not imagine was the way Dean’s eyes widened and his mouth opened in an almost comical ‘o’, or the way his whole body froze.

Cas didn't have enough energy left to feel embarrassed, and he wanted to go home now more than ever, so he just mumbled “Goodbye, Dean,” before turning away and walking in the direction of their apartment building.

Cas made it about half a block when he heard quick footsteps behind him, and felt a hand on his shoulder stopping him in his tracks. He turned around to find Dean standing close behind him looking devastated and yet vaguely hopeful. Cas didn't dare to think what that could mean.

“Cas…” Dean started. His eyes roved over Cas’ face as he chewed his bottom lip, and Cas’ heart beat steadily in his chest as waited to hear what his friend had to say. “Did you mean it?” Dean asked in almost a whisper.

“Did I…?” Cas pondered lying and telling Dean it had all been a joke, but he was so tired from hiding his feelings for so long that it was a relief to finally have them out in the open. “Yes. I meant it. And I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable, but I can’t change how I feel.” Cas looked down at his feet and fiddled nervously with his shirt sleeve. “I don’t _want_ to change how I feel.”

Cas was startled when Dean reached out a hand and gently cupped his chin, tilting his head upwards so their eyes could meet. Cas stared at him in confusion as he felt Dean’s thumb brush against his lower lip. “Sorry for being such an asshole. If I’d known how you felt I… Say it again.”

“Say what again?” Cas’ heart was now beating in double time, even as he took a step closer towards Dean, even as he gripped his waist in both hands.

“Tell me. Tell me how you feel about me.” Dean was breathing hard as he slid the hand on Cas’ chin round to cup his jaw, thumb tracing slow circles just under Cas’ eye, and as he moved the other hand to the back of Cas’ neck, fingers curled in his hair.

Cas smiled and said softly, “I love you, Dean Winchester.”

“ _God_ ,” Dean sobbed, then he leant in and pressed his lips to Cas’, and it was wonderful and a revelation and - yes - Cas felt like a _God_ , because surely no mere human deserved to feel such ecstasy.

Their mouths moved together in perfect synchrony as their bodies pressed impossibly closer, as though trying to become one being, and Cas got lost in the way he could draw delicious moans out of Dean using just his tongue and his hands.

They separated with no small amount of reluctance some time later, smiling dopily at each other with their limbs still tangled.

“I’m sorry. I never thought that - that this could be a thing you wanted,” Dean said, his brow furrowing slightly. Cas wanted to kiss his forehead until the lines went away.

“Don’t apologise, Dean. Please. We’re here now, aren't we? We know how we feel about each other.” Dean hadn't said as much yet but Cas knew, could tell from the way Dean held him like something precious and kissed him like he was dying.

Dean smiled again. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.” They kissed once more and then made their way home slowly, fingers entwined and pausing every now and then to share a kiss under the stars.

**Author's Note:**

> come find me on [tumblr](http://www.belahtalbot.tumblr.com)!!


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